Thursday, October 3, 2013

{day 3}::when envy threatens purpose...

scoot on over closer.  allow me to tell you something i am certain of.

anytime you are walking in God's will for your life, the enemy will do whatever he can to destroy that purpose.  anything.  and let's be completely  honest.  he doesn't even have to try that hard.  his techniques are never new. 

yet they always catch me off guard.  every single time.

today, i had completely different words to share with you. 

in the midst of a carpet picnic supper with my girl, the enemy snatch those words and ran away fast.  as i was scrolling through instagram, i landed on a picture.  one that made me both incredibly happy and oh-so-jealous at the same time.  the green-eyed monster snuck up fast and furious.  owning those feelings aren't easy.  but they are true and real.  they are exactly how i felt in that moment. 

i spent some time in prayer. 

i laid down my jealousy.  my feelings of inadequacy.  my questions of 'why not me?' and 'when will it be my turn?'  frustrations over always feeling like i'm sure of this purpose one minute and teetering on uncertainty the next. 

it's a rollercoaster at best.  a bungee jump at worst. 

how is it that i am sharing 31 days on purpose?  and yet i still have days when i question this purpose i feel has taken root and sprouted to life deep in my soul? 

a gentle whisper quieted the questions and restored clarity. 

God has a purpose for each of us.  a special purpose specifically for you.  and me.

your purpose may be to homeschool your precious babies and point them to the Cross in the everyday lessons of life.  or it may be to travel across the country as a top executive building a fortune 500 company while casting His light as you journey.  or perhaps it may be to suffer from a chronic illness while clinging to His promises with a fervor your physical body cannot muster.  or it could be to find contentment in the exact place you find yourself, showing others that it is all counted as joy.

the point is no one purpose is greater than the other. 

your purpose has been hand-crafted just for you.  for He knows there is no better person to fulfill His work. 

i may never have a photo like the one that stirred such ugliness in the deep, dark corners of my heart.  and that's okay. 

the best i can do, while still just a filthy rag, is submit myself to His calling and lean into to His gentle guidance.  when i take me out of the mix, i make room for Him to work. 

if i want Him to be greater, i must continue to be less. 

may i all but disappear, so that He may become bigger and brighter in my life.


'in a large house there are things made of gold and silver.
but there are also things made of wood and clay.
some of these are used for special purposes,
others for ordinary jobs.
the Lord wants to use you for special purposes,
 so make yourself clean from all evil.
then you will be holy, and the Master can use you.
you will be ready for any good work. 
 stay away from the evil things a young person
like you typically wants to do.
do your best to live right and to have faith, love, and peace,
 together with others who trust in the Lord with pure hearts.'
2 timothy 2:20-22

for more on 31 days of purpose, come on over...


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