Tuesday, October 30, 2012

{day 30} learning to embrace the change...

'Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty
 of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes.  
You should clothe yourselves instead with the
beauty that comes from within,
the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit,
which is so precious to God.'
1 Peter 3:3-4 (NLT)
I recited this to myself yesterday afternoon while 'modeling' for a hair show.  I use the term modeling loosely.  Very loosely.

My husband is in the beauty business.  He supplies stylists with all the product they need to make women feel beautiful and confident. 

He also keeps me stocked with the supplies I need, too.  But they are more in the form of compliments and reassurance.  Not so much in beauty supplies.

Every so often, his company hosts hair shows for stylists to attend for continuing ed credit. 

Yesterday was one of those. 

And I volunteered to be a model and get my hair cut and colored. 

The stylist was a well-known gentleman who has studied alongside Vidal Sassoon and Paul Mitchell.  He has practiced in London and almost every other major city in the United States. 

I felt confident that he would give me the look I was hoping for.  {And for free, to boot!}

The more he cut, the more I silently recited 1 Peter 3:3-4 in my heart.  The more he cut, the more I kept reassuring myself that it was just hair and it would, in fact, grow back.  The more he cut, the more anxious I felt myself getting.  The more he cut, the less beautiful I felt. {Not that I've ever really felt beautiful, but you know what I mean.}

What I got was a little more than what I was expecting. 

The tears flowed like a river when I looked in the mirror for the first time. 

It was different and it was drastic.

I managed to hold it together and make it through the end of the event.  But as soon as my husband and I were safely inside the car and heading to my boy's baseball game, the tears flowed freely.

My husband reassured me how much he loved the new 'do.  He told me that I would be beautiful if I didn't have an single hair on my head.  {He was chosen specifically for me because he is my number one encourager and number one supporter.  I love that man of mine!}

I heard the question mark at the end of my name when my daughter saw me for the first time. 


I'm feeling a little Justin Bieberish.  A little like a middle school boy with a skateboard. 

Lots of people have told me how much they like the new style. 

I'm not feeling it.  Yet.

I'm getting there.  But I haven't fully arrived.

I'm learning to graciously accept compliments {whether they are sincere or not} as truth.

I am still reminding myself that it is just hair.  I am still reciting 1 Peter 3:3-4 to my heart. 

I feel my Jesus whispering that He is enthralled with me.  Not my hair or my makeup or my clothes.  Just me.  My heart.  Which loves Him so. 

'People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.'
~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

May my beauty be found in a quiet and gentle spirit that loves Jesus with all she has.  And may His light radiate from the inside out. 

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